Da fundamentals

             I have got a question for you because I am in a culture where this is a very real thing. Have you ever been starving before? I say that I am starving all the time and I mean it, but I am talking about starving without the ability to find food. What about wicked thirsty? I spent three days (two nights) in the jungle last week, completely alone, and I dropped a quarter of my water on the way to my camp. I was so thirsty during those long, hot days that I prayed God would sustain me-which, he did. In a moment of desperation, I moved towards my water with the intent of finishing it off with still a full day left and then I ran smack into an angelic, girly figure. It turned out to be Seth Barnes Jr. holding two coconuts with a smile on his face. These he gave to me so the rest of the day, from three until the sun went down, I spent praising God (sometimes at the top of my lungs) and talking to God. I was so desperate for help from God that went it came I was elated.

            This is a lot what the Nicaraguan culture is like. Many are desperate for help and for answers to their problems though most never admit it. They put on a front much like I do when I am in the kitchen pretending that my insides are not about to fall out from hunger by putting on a, “Hey, I’m gonna knife you if you touch that bread foo,” attitude. When we share the Gospel message or invite them to a Bible study or church, most come. They come because they need help and they are always on their last option. This desperation causes quite the worship scene always. Every song has the most intense clapping ever but Nicaraguans don’t know how to clap so there is just a constant loud noise coming from a sea of hands. On Tuesday, the Pastor’s wife informed me that her church was undergoing a 72-hour fast and prayer Fri-Sunday because they are desperate for God’s help. The last Pastor was an alcoholic and left a year ago, deep into sin. This has caused the community to judge the church that we have been helping called, “The light of the World.” It was prophesied that the Devil was going to come against the church in a strong way and so immediately the congregation turned to God.

            I see motivations of fear, of hunger and thirst, and out of love for Jesus. Friends I have talked to in the United States that aren’t Christians have a different view of Christianity. How can it be a solution if we have no problems? Maybe the financial situation we are in with the economy will help to bring more desperation. We all need to be saved by Jesus and as it says in 2 Corinthians 5:15, “And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.” This verse sums up my quest (if you will), not living for myself but for Jesus. Seeking to serve Him. This has been the hardest battle for me but reading this calling straight from the Bible really hones me in on the purpose of life.

            It is amazing to be taken care of by God. These days have been very hard for me mentally and physically. I am trying to devote all I can to living out my faith and being a missionary here makes it really hard. There is this expectation from all the teenage thugs here that because I am Missionary, everything is excellent and easy in my life. They are always coming up to me and excitedly yelling, aaaayy, JOSE! Sometimes though, things aren’t alright and I am either burned out or struggling with the new way of thinking and viewing the world, which makes putting on a smile and giving bones or knucks (pounding fists) hard. When I look to the fundamentals of Christianity, however, and get away from the world, life is much easier to put into perspective. If any of you reading are being bogged down or feeling crappy, know what I am learning: No one has it all together. It is freedom to think of this.

-Jose